26 Things You Should Know About Ohio
Home to over 11.6 million people, Ohio has beautiful scenery, modern cities, and a diverse landscape and people. Sure, it rubs up against Kentucky, and its NFL teams are allergic to playoff success, but Ohio’s got plenty of upsides. However, before you decide to live there and buy a home there are 26 things you should probably know…
Locals swear all the #@%$ing time
According to a study by the Marchex Institute, residents of Ohio swear more than any other state in the country. If you’re offended by four-letter words and potty talk this isn’t the state for you.
Ohio yearns for the 1980s
Are you nostalgic for the days of Swatch watches, Jane Fonda workouts, and time traveling in a DeLorean? If you live in Ohio you will not be alone. Ohio ranks 6th for 1980s nostalgia, especially when it comes to Michael Jackson, Pee-wee Herman, and Van Halen.
They’re very curious about raccoon hunting
Americans universally do some odd stuff on the internet, but there are Google searches that are unique to certain states. For Ohio, residents search for these terms more than any other state: Raccoon hunting, Weight Watchers, P90X, Libertarian, and Lebron James.
You’ll save money on car insurance
According to Insure.com, Ohio residents have the least expensive car insurance in the country—$926 per year. Compare that to those poor suckers in Michigan whose average car insurance premiums are a whopping $2,551.
It’s illegal to get fish drunk in Ohio
Even if that fish is 21 and just put in a long day at the office, in Ohio it’s still illegal for you to give that fish a beer. Government, man.
So many pro sports teams to root for
Ohio is home to so many professional sports teams it’s hard to decide who to root for:
Cleveland Browns (NFL), Cincinnati Bengals (NFL), Cleveland Indians (MLB), Cincinnati Reds (MLB), Cleveland Cavaliers (NBA), Cleveland Rockers (WNBA), Columbus Blue Jackets (NHL), and Columbus Crew (MLS).
Beware of douchebags
Estately conducted a highly scientific study of the 100 largest U.S. cities and ranked them based on which ones have the most douchebags. They are abundant in Toledo, which came in 9th. Cincinnati was 36th, Cleveland was 51st, and Columbus was 63rd. While not fantastic, Ohio fared far better than Texas, which had four cities in the top ten.
Wait, it get’s worse…
Looking for a man who doesn’t live in his mom’s basement? Ohio is not the best place. The state is home to the fifth most immature men in America. Local men (ages 25-65) ranked highly for playing video games, watching “Family Guy,” and playing fantasy football and beer pong. This could also be interpreted as being the fifth-best state to be a bro.
Extreme enthusiasm for holiday music
If the idea of Christmas carols in September makes you want to puke your guts out then you might want to cross Ohio off your list. According to an AccuRadio study, the Buckeye State logs the fifth most hours of streamed holiday music, proving it has plenty of holiday spirit.
5.1% unemployment rate
As the economy slowly crawls out of the hole it’s been in there are encouraging economic signs. Ohio’s unemployment rate is 5.1%, which ties it for 20th place in the nation. North Dakota is tops with 2.8%, and Nevada and Mississippi are tied for worst at 7.1%.
Crowded for hunters
Ohio does not have an abundance of public lands open to hunting—just 2.5% of the state. On top of that, there are ten hunters for every acre of available public hunting land. That’s bad news for hunters, and really bad news for deer and other woodland creatures.
Few DUI arrests
Ohio has the fifth fewest arrests for drunk driving (OVI) per capita of any state. Perhaps that’s because of harsh penalties, more responsible drinkers, lax enforcement, or some seriously awesome designated drivers.
Lots of Amish
Ohio has more Amish residents than any other state. If you want to make friends with people who can teach you to raise a barn or churn some butter then Ohio is the spot.
Santa might move to Ohio
With the polar ice caps melting it’s only a matter of time before Santa Claus has to relocate. While a bit of a long shot, Ohio is the tenth most ideal state for Santa to move to. Ohio won points because of a strong manufacturing sector and an abundance of cookie stores— the third most in America!
Ohioans set all kinds of world records
Track star Jesse Owens won four gold medals at the 1936 Olympics, but he’s just one of many Ohio residents who’ve set world records. Locally set world records include the longest marathon playing kickball (51 hours), largest yo-yo (4,620 pounds), largest collection of trolls (2,990 unique trolls), largest pumpkin pie (3,699 pounds), largest meatball (1,100 pounds), and the longest walk-through horror house (4,951 feet).
Chris Wesseling no longer inhabits Ohio
If you plan to move to Ohio in hopes of inviting Cincinnati native Chris Wesseling over to drink beer and play cornhole then prepare yourself for disappointment. The Around the NFL writer now resides in Los Angeles, a place where he can celebrate Westivus (the annual celebration of the Bengals losing in the playoffs) in relative peace and sunshine.
It’s the Napa Valley of the Midwest
Ohio may not be the first state that comes to mind when it comes to making wine, but the state produces over 3 million gallons of wine each year—seventh most in the country.
Whole lot of obesity
Ohio has the 8th highest obesity rate in the country (29.5%), but if you’re really into super-sized people you can just wander across the border to neighboring West Virginia, which is tops with a 33.5% obesity rate.
Minimum wage is $8.10 per hour
The minimum wage in Ohio is $8.10 per hour, which is $0.85 higher than the national minimum wage. Over the course of a year, a full-time minimum wage worker would make an additional $1,765 by working in Ohio. That’s enough to buy 88 of these 10-inch Johnny Manziel plush dolls.
More likely to get robbed than beaten up
According to the FBI Uniform Crime Report, Ohio has the sixth-lowest occurrence of aggravated assault, but it has the seventh most robberies and ninth most burglaries. So while you may be safe, your possessions are not.
Ohio will survive the zombie apocalypse (barely)
When the zombie apocalypse inevitably occurs, Ohio will be one of the states that survives (here’s proof). Ohio is poised to defeat an army of the undead thanks to its knowledge of zombies (8th best) and paintball skills (3rd best).
Ohio frequently comes in first
Ohio is home to a lot of firsts, including the first pro baseball team (Cincinnati Reds), ambulance service (1865), traffic light (1914), pop-top can, police car, professional city fire department, Neil Armstrong (the first man to walk on the moon), full-time automobile service station, laws to protect working women, hot dog (1900), interracial and coeducational college in America (Oberlin College—1833), city to be lighted electrically (Cleveland—1879), American made automobile, and African American elected to public office.
Pretty nice little museum scene
The Ohio museum scene is great, and so much more than just the Pro Football Hall of Fame in Canton and the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland. The state is also home to the Bicycle Museum of America, Cowan Pottery Museum, Medina Toy and Train Museum, Merry-Go-Round Museum, and the AMA Motorcycle Hall of Fame. So Ohio has that going for it, which is nice.
Great state for Bigfoot and Bigfoot enthusiasts
If you’re a Sasquatch or Bigfoot looking for a new place to live you should really consider Ohio, ranked three 4th best state for Bigfoot to live. Not only does it have multiple Bigfoot festivals, and numerous groups of amateur and professional Sasquatch enthusiasts, it also has 234 “credible Bigfoot sightings,” so there’s a chance to mingle with other hairy 8-foot-tall man-apes.
Melonheads
In addition to Bigfoot sightings, and rumors of Loch Ness-like creatures inhabiting the lakes, Ohio is uniquely famous for its Melonheads. These legendary creatures are small humanoids with bulbous heads. Some say their oversized heads were caused by weird medical experiments, others say it was the work of UFOs, and still others claim they just wandered down from Michigan.
Strange food preferences
In an Estately study of food and diet-related online searches it discovered Ohio searches for these terms more than any other state: turtle meat, sauerkraut, chili, grinders, goetta (pictured above), Weight Watchers, and Curves International. One can only assume that Ohio is home to large numbers German weight loss groups preparing to feast on a cheat day.
Want to buy a home in Ohio?
Did the information in this article convince you to live and buy a home and Washington? If so, check out Estately.com when searching for a home for sale in Washington state.
